Pam Sievers

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How to plug a snake hole

by Pam Sievers 21 Comments

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It’s been two weeks since we’ve called Arizona home. One week if you count when the furnishings arrived. In that time, we’ve learned many lessons, from the news, online, and from friends who have experience living in the southwest, especially Carole and Carolyn, our mentors for living here, though they now live in Indiana. Hmmm? I never wanted to learn any of these lessons, I assure you, and they are never included in “where to retire” articles.

Here are my ten quick take-aways, and don’t get creeped out – leave that to me. Just read to the end.

  1. How to plug a snake hole – If the center seam in your garage floor leaves a gap when the door is closed, gum it up with some Wal-mart brand disposable ear plugs. That is the only brand sticky enough to stay in place.  
  2. Check the holes in your pool noodles – Apparently, snakes also like to seek solace in the hollow core of a pool noodle. Are you freaking kidding me??? Maybe I need to put ear plugs in the ends. Or just keep them in the car.
  3. Listen for crickets – Scorpions love crickets so when you start hearing the chirp-chirp of those buggers, keep your eye open for the creepy crawlies.
  4. Scorpions can crawl up bed skirts – This is a no-brainer. I’ll risk the dust bunnies that procreate under my bed.
  5. How to kill a scorpion – Use something long and sharp to pierce their back. Let’s hope I never have to use the mega, never-used meat fork we brought with us, but we’re prepared in case we need it. I’ll have to stop gasping first, however.
  6. Monsoon season is upon us – Late afternoon into evening often brings a short, and often powerful storm. Unlike Michigan or Wisconsin, these storms do not clear out the air, but simply drop the temperature to a balmy 98 or so. This also means we are dealing with humidity of 50 – 60% some days.    
  7. Toxic toads – Seems the current monsoons bring out toxic toads. But I’m not worrying – they are only toxic to dogs!  
  8. Many uses of car screens – We’ve recently discovered that when you back into a parking space between two trucks and against a wall, your car’s sun screen transforms your vehicle into a dressing room. Perfect solution for two women on the go. Ha!
  9. The heat – We’ve been stuck in a heat extreme (today’s high is up to 113) and by the end of the week, we should be back to the normal of 105, with 101 by Sunday. Oh, Glory Days! We have solar energy for our home, so I don’t feel so guilty setting the ac as I have been. It will take me a while to ease into setting it higher.
  10. Appearance takes a hit – It is impossible to look good when it’s 110 degrees. My hair hangs, my clothes sag, make-up is simply pushed to the back of the drawer. Comfort has been redefined.

In all seriousness, Kathy and I are both loving it here and people we’ve met have never seen snakes or scorpions around their homes. This is not an issue in everyday living where we live. Out on hiking trails is another story, and of course, we will be vigilant in pest-management every quarter. And my hiking days may be limted.

Our days are still spent getting settled, but this week, we are beginning to check out the clubs and activities we are each interested in. We’ve gone to the pool in the evening several times and have met wonderful people. It’s really like living in the Midwest here, as so many people have moved from there. I’m really excited for the lives we will develop here, and the learning curve that will continue, but I hope I never have to write on snakes or scorpions again!

Filed Under: Humor Lite

Comments

  1. Gaylene Tonkovich says

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    Hi Pam,
    Very interesting information! I know I could never live there.
    Just the thought of snakes and all the other things scare me.
    I will enjoy reading about all the adventures that you shares.

    Always love your quilts too!
    ??

    Reply
    • Pam Sievers says

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      Thanks for the read and comment and I assure you, what we have here is no worse than what Florida has – matter of fact, there are no alligators to be found, and I know you love spending time there.

      Reply
      • Barbara J Sawyer-Koch says

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        What an exciting journey on which you have embarked! I am not a heat-loving person, so the attraction of Arizona, to me, is limited to the dry air. May you keep the scorpions and snakes at bay as you experience the delights of your new surroundings!

        Reply
        • Pam Sievers says

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          Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment. It will be an adventure, I assure you.

          Reply
  2. Sandy Lingo says

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    Pretty sure you won’t be hired by Welcome Wagon or the Chsmber of Commerce, but you should win a trophy for writing a snappy blogpost before you’re even settled!

    Reply
    • Pam Sievers says

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      Thanks, Sandy. I probably was pretty tough but this really has been a great move.

      Reply
  3. Kate Mahar says

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    I’m not sure, but possibly the only way to truly avoid snakes is to move to Ireland – a scenario I find increasingly attractive for a number of reasons! Pam, I had a dream about you two last night. I wish I could say you were living in an igloo or something amusing but all I remember is that it was so hot, even the sky was kind of orange. Never mind. We’ll all be envious in January! Fun piece, my friend!

    Reply
    • Pam Sievers says

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      Thanks, Kate. This is an interesting move, for sure… and so far, loving it, despite the heat.

      Reply
  4. Carolyn Brown says

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    Very enjoyable, Pam! It brings back memories of our “learning curve” in AZ. HaHa.

    Reply
    • Pam Sievers says

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      Thanks, Carolyn. Glad you enjoyed it.

      Reply
  5. Sue says

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    So funny! BTW, we see solid pool noodles in Aruba…shop around. Mostly, my brain is stuck in a creative mode thinking of other uses for sticky ear plugs! And loving this cloudy day here in mid Michigan.

    Reply
    • Pam Sievers says

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      Thanks, Sue. Glad you enjoyed it. I love when my writing inspires people, even if it is to use ear plugs creatively.

      Reply
  6. Dave Lindahl says

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    Lions, tigers and bears, O my!! Loved your post this week. I hope you get used to the temperature, you can always remember the yankee land from the old days. 113 not me!

    Reply
    • Pam Sievers says

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      Thanks, Dave. Yes, I will always remember mylife back in the upper Midwest.

      Reply
  7. Jenifer Thomas says

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    Glad you are settling in. I’m looking forward to hearing about all the groups and clubs you will no doubt be soon a part of.

    Reply
    • Pam Sievers says

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      Thanks, Jen. I’ll keep you posted. I’ll gravitate toward quilting and writing in the beginning.

      Reply
  8. Josee says

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    Awesome, love the way you express your thoughts. So true as I’ve lived in the valley a long time. I like #8 as I’ve done that many times myself?.
    Welcome to AZ so nice to have you here!?☀️???

    Reply
  9. Ellen says

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    Anonymous adventure. You always make the mundane interesting.
    Wild life is ok as long as they stay where they are suppose to.
    ENJOY. You deserve it !!!!

    Reply
  10. Carol Rhan says

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    Pam I am so excited for you both in this new adventure. Love the lessons and that you have solar in your new home. And that you are searching out clubs and other activities to fulfill your passions.

    Reply
  11. Sherry says

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    Enjoy and I think you are both very brave in making such a bold move!

    Reply
  12. Linda Johnson says

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    Good job! You’ve managed to discourage newcomers from staying too long! Although I’ve never encountered a scorpion or snake , check out Black Widow Spiders and the scary Tarantula Hawk Wasp., both of which I have met up close and personally.

    Reply

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Welcome to my website where my goal was to fill the pages with writing that induces gut wrenching laughs. Since I have no spouse, in-laws, children, grandchildren or pets, I have to work a whole lot harder than most humor writers. Hence, instead you’ll find a blog that features travel, contemplative reflections, and of course some humor – you can’t embrace middle age without it. When not writing, I enjoy quilting, learning about other cultures, and living in the Arizona desert.

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