They Couldn’t Pay Me Enough…

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In the past couple of weeks, I’ve seen stories on the news that make me question the sanity of people. No, I’m not talking breaking stories of national significance.

I’m talking about the people who pitched tents so they could be first in line to shell out $1000 for a new phone. It’s a phone!  And I thought, you couldn’t pay me enough to do that.

Then there were the Michigan State University students who camped out so they could get tickets to the student section at the basketball games. I understand that a bit more because when you’re 19, sitting in the Izzone is as good as life gets. But even if I was a kid, I still don’t think you could pay me enough to spend a night or two out in the late fall crisp air of Michigan. I don’t know. Maybe that one you could.

Then I began to think of other examples of when there’s not enough money in the world…

• You couldn’t pay me enough to work as a telemarketer, AGAIN. When I returned home from college one summer, I brought home a surly attitude and little motivation to find a summer job. When I told my folks there weren’t any jobs in my small town, (I’m not sure I even looked), my dad came home with one for me. The next day, I began cold-calling people selling restaurant coupon books over the phone. Within 24 hours, I found a job that didn’t include people hanging up on me. You couldn’t pay me enough to be a telemarketer today.
• You couldn’t pay me enough to wait an hour at a restaurant to be seated. If the food or ambiance was worth that wait, they’d have a reservation system, so I’m astonished when people are willing to wait crazy-long times for medium quality, over-priced food, in a crowded restaurant with screaming children. Even if you took out the children, you couldn’t pay me enough to wait that long.
• You couldn’t pay me enough to get up in the middle of the night so I can be part of a large over-zealous, under-slept herd to get a good deal on a hot gift. I remember when Hudson’s (pre-Marshall Fields which was pre-Macy’s) had the best Christmas decorations and one year, I was there when they opened on December 26. I said, ‘Nope, not gonna happen again.’ I get way too grouchy without my sleep to be pushed, shoved and elbowed by other crazed shoppers. You couldn’t pay me enough to do that.

It’s not always patience, I understand that, but for me, it usually is.

This morning when I woke up, it was 15 degrees, 20 degrees colder than normal. The snow that fell last evening is still on the back deck despite the full sun today. It’s time to get the snow shovel out and fill the bucket of de-ice stuff used for the sidewalk. The snow scraper for my car along with a blanket, extra set of mittens and a hat need to find their way out of summer storage. And as I write this, I think of friends and family members who are saying, ‘you couldn’t pay me enough.’

Maybe I need to question my own sanity first.

So what’s on your list of “they couldn’t pay me enough…”?